Laddoo! {लड्डू!}

The ISC results were declared today and the topper has a whopping 99.75% in the class 12th board exams! That means she lost just one mark. It still beats me how can one score a perfect 100 in languages! Weren't we told, "Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection we can catch excellence," though I always preferred, "Perfection itself is imperfection."

My neighbour's 17 year old has gone in a shell. His results are yet to come and he is visibly dreading the moment. The parents are worked up because the boy has all the entrance exams lined up and he seems to have suddenly gone in his "trance state" (as they call it!).

It turns out the guy has been an exceptionally bright student in his school days and has won accolades for not only his excellent academic performance but an enormous bunch of extra-curricular and co-curricular activities too. And hence it didn't raise any eyebrows when he was made to opt for the quintessential combination of Physics-Chemistry-Maths for his 11th-12th. What actually had the parents baffled was the nose-diving of his scores in every exam that he took in his 11th. The parents seem to be intelligent and understanding folks but no amount of intelligence or understanding could enable them to take this kindly, especially when the falling of the scores seems to be the only constant factor in the last two years of his academic pursuits.

The boy has been convinced about doing his undergraduate from the best american or indian universities, followed by an MBA from any of the world’s premier institute. Yet the once confident, highly extrovert boy has gone in a shell of sorts. Till two years ago I would bump into him every evening in the Tennis court, or in the Badminton court. Often he would breeze past me on his speeding bicycle, while I walked on the track in the mornings or some mornings he would just be doing umpteen laps of the pool, swimming like a dolphin.

I can vivdly remember him being the undisputed star of the annual cultural programs. If his acting prowess won him the best actor award, his soulful renedition of a popular Arijeet Singh number had everyone on their feet, clapping, even after several minutes of his performance.

Today when I saw him, he just gave me a smile that looked fake and forced. It felt like someone had smothered the spring of joy inside him, mercilessly. He was this unsure of himself kid, who did not know what life had in store for him, seemed actually scared of what lay ahead, highly anxious, and totally apprehensive. He seemed to be withering off, in some strange sort of way.

I am wondering if this is how the girls who committed suicide in Kota, a few days back, had started dying much before they actually killed themselves. If you look at the statistics, it's scary. At least 19 JEE aspirants ended their lives in 2015 while five students have taken the extreme step in 2016.  The disturbing figure is enough to move anyone with a heart. The Collector of Kota has proved he is no exception and has actually written an emotional letter to parents of over 1.5 lakh students in coaching institutes of Kota. 

He made an emotional appeal in the letter, asking parents “not to force their expectations and dreams on their children and let them do what they want and are able to do.” He also mentioned “a recent suicide letter by a young girl, written in perfect grammar and in beautiful running handwriting, where she thanked her mother for giving up her career for raising the children. In another suicide note, a girl requested her parents to allow her younger sister to do what she likes.” The Collector wrote in his letter that life is beautiful and clearing an exam is not everything[1].

Parents have been known to force their aspirations on children since ages. One of the greatest writers of Hindi literature, Chandradhar Sharma Guleri, had written a short story (called Laddoo*) highlighting the same issue, a hundred years back. So the dilemma of artificially doing what their parents wanted them to do, is not something new for the indian children. The baffling fact is the path the younger generation has chosen now, the supposedly more peaceful and effortless action - death! 

*लड्डू   -   चंद्रधर शर्मा गुलेरी 

एक पाठशाला का वार्षिकोत्सव था। मैं भी वहाँ बुलाया गया था। वहाँ के प्रधान अध्यापक का एकमात्र पुत्र, जिसकी अवस्था आठ वर्ष की थी, बड़े लाड़ से नुमाइश में मिस्टर हादी के कोल्हू की तरह दिखाया जा रहा था। उसका मुंह पीला था, आँखें सफेद थीं, दृष्टि भूमि से उठती नहीं थी। प्रश्न पूछे जा रहे थे। उनका वह उत्तर दे रहा था। धर्म के दस लक्षण सुना गया, नौ रसों के उदाहरण दे गया। पानी के चार डिग्री के नीचे शीतलता में फैल जाने के कारण और उससे मछलियों की प्राण-रक्षा को समझा गया, चंद्रग्रहण का वैज्ञानिक समाधान दे गया, अभाव को पदार्थ मानने, न मानने का शास्त्रार्थ कर गया और इंग्लैंड के राजा आठवें हेनरी की स्त्रियों के नाम और पेशवाओं का कुर्सीनामा सुना गया।

यह पूछा गया कि तू क्या करेगा? बालक ने सिखा-सिखाया उत्तर दिया कि मैं यावज्जन्म लोकसेवा करूँगा। सभा 'वाह वाह' करती सुन रही थी, पिता का हृदय उल्लास से भर रहा था।

एक वृद्ध महाशय ने उसके सिर पर हाथ फेरकर आशीर्वाद दिया और कहा कि जो तू इनाम माँगे, वही दें। बालक कुछ सोचने लगा। पिता और अध्यापक इस चिंता में लगे कि देखें, यह पढ़ाई का पुतला कौन-सी पुस्तक माँगता है।

 बालक के मुख पर विलक्षण रंगों का परिवर्तन हो रहा था, हृदय में कृत्रिम और स्वाभाविक भावों की लड़ाई की झलक आँखों में दीख रही थी। कुछ खाँसकर, गला साफ कर नकली परदे के हट जाने से स्वयं विस्मित होकर बालक ने धीरे से कहा, 'लड्डू।'

 पिता और अध्यापक निराश हो गए। इतने समय तक मेरी साँस घुट रही थी। अब मैंने सुख की साँस भरी। उन सब ने बालक की प्रवृत्तियों का गला घोंटने में कुछ उठा नहीं रखा था, पर बालक बच गया। 

उसके बचने की आशा है, क्योंकि वह 'लड्डू' की पुकार जीवित वृक्ष के हरे पत्तों का मधुर मर्मर था, मरे काठ की आलमारी की सिर दुखाने वाली खड़खड़ाहट नहीं।

I just hope and pray that the changing times, and possibly some divine intervention, will empower our younger generation to have the courage to stand up for themselves and say,  "Laddoo!" 

©Fursatnama

[1] http://indianexpress.com/article/india/india-news-india/after-yet-another-suicide-kota-dc-writes-to-parents-not-to-burden-the-children-2780563/